Please read one of the articles linked at the bottom of the page. My name is Emily. For a long time, I assumed this would be enough to interest potential life partners. I entered the dating pool without artifice, looking for solid friendships and conversation that could eventually turn into something more. If you want to find a partner, you have to play the game — and the game is shaped by social media, dating apps and casual sex.
I am ill-equipped to play this game, a lesson I began learning in college when a fellow student asked for my Snapchat. When two people want to get to know each other better, they exchange social media accounts to communicate. Only when a relationship becomes more serious are phone numbers exchanged. After this incident, I briefly obtained a Snapchat. Bad call. At first, I thought this was unique to one or two sleazy men.
But I came to realize couples communicating over social media frequently exchanged explicit images, either as a precursor to a hook-up or a step toward making a relationship more serious.
I also learned that young people — particularly women — are expected to know that communicating on social media will result in some kind of proposition or unwanted image. People who send unsolicited images generally express surprise or confusion, rather than sheepishness, when their advances are strenuously rebuffed.
I think I deleted Snapchat within a month of downloading it. Most modern romantic interactions begin with the assumption that some sexual exchange will occur.
