Many people, especially those early in their careers struggle with how to develop friendships with the coworkers they like as they navigate a new and unfamiliar environment. Katy was a magnetic, high-spirited manager who was well-liked by everyone in the office. I knew from the moment I saw her that we could totally be friends. It was my third day of work as a writer in a small marketing agency, and I was unsure about the culture or how friendly I could be from the get-go.
Early career. How to Turn a Coworker into a Friend. I was curious about the same thing but was too nervous to ask!
Instead of highlighting your differences with someone, try to seize opportunities to highlight the things you have in common. This could be anything from your interests to your worldviews. Create a casual ritual. Book a recurring check-in that feels unique to the two of you.
If you have both had your eye on the new bestseller, invite your potential friend to read a few chapters a week and discuss over lunch breaks. Say the quiet part aloud. After sharing a belly laugh or discovering yet another commonality, offer something that verbally affirms the value this person adds to your life. Changing the social backdrop upon which you normally interact with someone allows you to see others in a new way, and it gives us practice being friends outside of work.
Read more on Early career or related topics Managing yourself and Interpersonal communication. Danielle Bayard Jackson is a relational health educator who examines the ways in which our social connections impact our well being. Partner Center.
