I was scrolling Bumble when I came across a profile of a guy I know. A very married guy I know. Not to completely stereotype someone, but he is exactly the kind of guy you would expect to see popping on to a dating app for a bit of a sneaky peek at what is on offer outside his marriage. I was faced with a decision⦠do I screen shot his profile and reveal all to his very sweet wife, or scroll on and say nothing? It opened a pandoras box of questions⦠would his wife want to know? Would I be single-handedly destroying their marriage?
Is it my place to interfere? I took the screenshots and then had a deep ponder. I asked a very close friend I could trust with a secret like this. Heck I even googled the answer. Jana Hocking pictured was scrolling a dating app when she came across a profile of a guy she knows. And after roughly 24 hours of sitting with this information, I came up with an answer. It was a definite no. I would not tell his wife.
Now, many of you will be outraged by this. Especially anyone who has been cheated on before, or currently have their suspicions. But my reasoning is very simple. Unless I literally walked in on him uploading his photos to a dating website do I really know if it was him?
How do I know that it's actually cheating - perhaps, like a lot of couples right now, they've decided to try out being in an open marriage? You would be surprised by the seemingly innocent couples who are currently ENM ethically non monogamous. Seriously, after I wrote about my own ethically non monogamous experience, I was inundated by friends who admitted under the cloak of secrecy that they were in ENM marriages. Shook I tell you! I even had a couple in my friendship group hit me up for some fun.
There's another situation that puts the whole 'cheating' thing into a grey area. I'm discovering that often in couples, one loses interest in sex and doesn't mind if the other ventures out to find it elsewhere, they just never address it.
