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I met this very good looking Canadian who picked me up and took me to his hotel room. We began to have sex, he slapped me on the face, took me from behind while pulling my hair.
When it was all over Iβknees shakingβfelt exhilarated, fulfilled, happy. From then on I developed a fixation with rough sex, being dominated and one night stands.
I hardly ever dated and have been promiscuous ever since. I went on living my life this way. Pain, pleasure, sex, beauty, drugs and love have always being intertwined within my essence. Experts have tried to find a cause or explanation for sadism and masochism and why some people find these practices pleasurable. Some mention childhood experiences, endorphin-based mechanisms, learned behavior, genetic disposition or simple conscious choice.
It makes no difference to me. It is what it is. We did some ecstasy and went to his apartment where we began kissing passionately. As I was falling for him, he whispered to my ear "it feels like love, but it's the drugs". I couldn't believe what I heard, but it was true. Hedonism, drugs, sex for money, love, outlaws, prisons, BDSM, machismo, humiliation, skanks, unsafe sex and young menβmy experiences, my likes and my wants compelled me to put together this web gallery.
I couldn't resist the opportunity to express them through the artwork of some of my peers. I find it darkβscary evenβbut beautiful. It turns me on. It was the cover of Vile Magazine. It is strong and shocking. De Sana's work has been described as anti-art.