He was a sportsman and successful in his profession, but never told me what he really did for a living. But I guessed from his clothes and jewellery that he must be in the upper middle class. Surprisingly, he was single. He had never had a steady relationship that lasted for a long period of time.
When asked why his relationships all fell apart at some point, he said that none of the women could live with his fetish. He, on the other hand, did not want any secrecy alongside an existing relationship, and he could not suppress his fetish for too long.
I encountered this problem of fetish with compatibility of partnership and everyday life very often when I talked to the men. He could have sex without his desire, but this did not give him the same fulfilment. He was a foot fetishist. To date, I had encountered the fetish more in connection with worn shoes and socks or extravagant heels. His request was characterised by the fact that his partner's feet were used on an equal footing with his hands and were included in the sexual interaction.
Interestingly, I knew I would never fall in love with this man. He would not appeal to me as a potential steady partner. I would not want to date him. And yet he had a certain attraction for me. There was a certain sexual crackle between us. And so I experienced really good sex without love for the first time and realised for myself that sexuality doesn't necessarily need love.
On the contrary, sometimes love is rather counterproductive in terms of satisfying sex. But sympathy is a must. This existed between us in a weird and somehow very unique way. So we got into conversation. He told me a lot about his fetish in general and that many followers of it would be ashamed, whether it was already quite well-known and whether there was a certain tolerance towards it in society. He said to me: "I have never seen a person who openly admits that he likes to sniff worn sneakers and masturbate.
