May 13, PM Subscribe looking for some NSA encounter while travelling, willing but clueless: help me do this casual hookup thing? I'm visiting Berlin and Amsterdam in the next couple of weeks, and for a bunch of reasons to do with new life goals which include broadening my horizons, I'd like to experience a discreet genuinely no-strings-attached sexual encounter with someone I'll never see again. I have never done this before, and I have no idea where even to start.
I'd appreciate some frank and basic tips. Assume total ignorance and naivety. Relevant details: - Im mids female looking for male - I have never picked a guy up, only been in long-term relationships - I'm attractive, good dancer, socially confident, I just never did the whole random hookup thing what I want to know are things like - specific places in Berlin and Amsterdam I might go to safely hook up with guys in their late20ss.
I like nice bars with good vibe, dancing optional but not against it - how to maintain discretion eg do I lie about my name? What if they come to my place and refuse to leave? I'm also generally creeped out by craigslist. I can address the STD's thing - the guy wears a condom. It's simple as that, basically. As for who goes to whose place - that is something you negotiate in the moment. Personally, I tend to prefer that most first or only sex happens on my turf, because I'm a tiny bit safer that way.
I've never had a problem with someone refusing to leave; although, I have a pretty well-tuned creep meter. Lie about your name if you want, don't if you don't. And don't put too much pressure on yourself for it to happen, because that'll come across as a desperation kind of thing and could put guys off. The few times I've had spontaneous romps while traveling, I had absolutely no idea that it was going to happen when I met the guy; it started out as me asking directions in the hotel lobby or something, and he said "oh, I'm going to thus and such a place too," and then we end up going to thus and such a place together and it's a great conversation and then the conversation just starts getting even more interesting and then there are sparks and bingo.
So - embrace the idea that you just might end up going home alone on a given night and be ready to roll with that and then you may not after all. It has a great hook-up vibe and most people know what they are there for; mainly one night stands. If you want, you can give a guy any name you want and just make sure you follow the Empress' advice.
