Some people think open marriages are another form of affairs , infidelity or betrayal, that lead to the demise of the marriage. Some people believe open marriages can be hurtful and damaging to relationships in general. Open marriages and polyamory are being talked about more so than ever before as the subject is not so shocking to most as the terms have been normalized by experts in the field and mainstream media. Monogamy or consensual nonmonogamy is becoming more a topic to discuss among people who are interested in alternatives to traditional lifestyles.
I am currently working with a couple where the husband is in a polyamorous relationship and his wife is not. What I mean is, while serial monogamy is popular, lifelong monogamy is obsolete and whether we like it or not, polyamory is catching on.
Talk about what your definition is of open. Is an open marriage just an excuse to have an affair? Do you already have someone that you are interested in and you want to pursue the relationship, but you want permission from your partner?
An open marriage is something that you both agree will enhance your relationship, not hurt your intimate connection. What is your vision of what your open marriage will look like in a year? This is an important conversation for several reasons, it will help you get clear about where this open relationship idea might be going. I just want to try it, I think I can get it out of my system after a month or two, or after we have sex once or twice with other people.
You will need to look more carefully at your ideas of an open relationship. Is having an open relationship about finding casual sex and a little swinging on the weekends, or is it more about finding love and a polyamorous relationship where you can expand your emotional connection and integrate other partners as long-term relationships into your lives?
