From Cosmopolitan. OK, so my boyfriend and I have been dating for almost two years, and aside from his unwillingness to pick up his clothes off the floor, our relationship is perfect … almost. When we first started dating, I asked him what he was into sexually in the middle of making out and I had never done the things he's into before.
I was really reluctant to even try, but because I liked him, I tried and it's led to some pretty sexy times. But and I know it's mostly my fault because I was tightlipped about them , he just isn't willing to try any of my kinks at all. And we've talked about it, and he can never give me a good answer as to why he just won't do it. I've begged and pleaded with him to try, and he just isn't interested, and I'm starting to get bored, but I don't want to leave him over it.
What do I do? Sometimes, our kinks just don't align - and that's OK. But I worry your boyfriend of two years doesn't seem to be willing to compromise at all - and can't give you a "good answer.
And it's hard to get turned on by a guy who simply rebuffs your desires without respecting you enough to give you a good reason. So instead of begging and pleading more - which is just not a good look - I'd focus a little bit more on trying to get him to open up and getting to know him a bit better. I know some guys just get so threatened by a woman's sexuality that they become jealous or afraid: Maybe it feels safer for him to be in control, and he's terrified that you'll see him as a nervous beginner and not the sexually dominant man he imagines himself to be.
It might scare him that you're more experienced in some ways or worry him to think that you've been satisfied by men in ways he's never known. That kind of chauvinist insecurity is pretty common among guys, who often prefer to take the lead as a hedge against admitting more complicated feelings or doubts.
